Monday, July 26, 2010

Gimme Pizza by Bubba

I'm sure Emma will be filling you all in on our wonderful trip to Italy (wonderful is an understatement), but I wanted to bring you some disturbing observations.

Number one observation = small things


Look at her. Are you looking? She's so cute. I know the cliche good things come in small packages but I never would have thought something so tiny would be such a fun travel partner. Ok, so this isn't a disturbing observation, but we didn't get to ride in this triwagon and that's upsetting.

Number two observation = camera clowns


Behind Emma is the Leaning Tower of Pisa. Surrounding Emma are approximately 72 camera clowns. What's a camera clown you ask? Well first let's start with what I think of when I think of a regular clown. Most clowns aren't funny. You know what I mean, when you go to a traditional circus and maybe the funniest thing a clown does is accidentally fall down because his shoes are too big? Ok, now imagine just you and that clown are in a room alone. He first makes a joke in an overly nasalized voice which falls flat. He then blow's water out of his lapel flower getting you wet. The next thing you know he is trying to eat you because he thinks he's really the clown from Stephen King's It. Awkward. Well take that same awkward behavior and superimpose that onto someone posing for a picture. Perhaps some pictures of camera clowns in action might better illustrate the awkwardness.


Is she REALLY holding up the Leaning Tower? That's so funny if she is. She's so funny.


This CC (camera clown) is new...yet still funny.


I was never good at it. My Asian friend next to me is a seasoned veteran which makes me look even worse. From my experience as a guide in Paris, there are an overwhelming amount of Asian CC's. All quite funny.

I do hope you all are getting the sarcasm in this. The result of CCing has sapped at least five years off of my life. I do not enjoy it one bit. Am I being too harsh? Perhaps I am. If you think so send me an email.

Number three observation = devastating beauty


This place was painfully beautiful. Painfully is no hyperbole here. It literally caused me pain.


Here I am getting ready to start my trek. Em thought it would be fun to hike through Cinque Terre, a string of five small Italian villages connected by a hiking trail romantically dubbed "Lover's Trail."


And here I am about ten minutes later. It turns out being a bike tour guide for six months prepares you very little in the way of hiking fitness.

Number four observation = farming can happen to you


No, no. No I'm not wearing a white t-shirt while swimming in the Mediterranean. Embarrassingly enough, yes, that is my real skin. The months of minimal leisure time as a result being a tour guide in the peak tourist season has left me with a hideous farmer's tan. I'm not proud of it, but am sharing it with you for the sake of comedy. Be gentle with me, I'm delicate.

Overall the trip to Italy was a huge success. Em and I enjoyed a very needed break away from Paris and discovered what we think is our new favorite spot in the world.

1 comment:

  1. Forget the farmer's tan, I'm grooving on all your man hair. DUDE!! The little boy swimming in my hot tub in a girl's bathing suit has morphed.